Bikini Body Babes - Yep thats what we are!

Well bloggers what a weekend, I have not laughed so much for so long for an awful long time! And can you believe I came home today and went for a 4 and a half mile run round virginia water lake, I really dont know what came over me and I cant blame anyone else except myself because it was all my idea, the thing is I made it, still cant believe it and neither can my legs, boy are they hurting now, god knows what they will be like by the time morning comes....

So back to 6.45am yesterday morning and thankfully no hangover, good start when you are going to be exercising all day. Its embarrassing to write it down and honest we dont have an alcohol problem and of course we were on the bikini bootcamp but we still managed to down a bottle of champers and 4 glasses of wine each, good job we started early! I think Drill Instructor Mike got the measure of us pretty quickly because when they messed up our beauty bookings so they werent at the same timem as way of consolation he got them to give us a free bottle of champers, not that I'm complaining mind.

Breakfast was three little bowls of fruit and some yummy kind of porridge, muesli thing. Mummy Mumma (thats the rather large coloured lady) asked if there was any more after that, think she was looking for a bacon sarnie, she wasnt impressed when Mike said she shouldnt have her cup of tea, caffeine not good before a long day exercising apparently. Actually her and her daughter, Baby Mumma were quite nice and rather interesting but clearly not that experienced in the exercise department. Still cant really work out why they were there given that Mummy Mumma didnt/couldnt do half the stuff! Sian the pharmacist is the slowest eater on the planet I have decided and Raymondo is a close second..

So off we set at 7.30am for a brisk hour and a half walk, followed by circuits. Raymondo didnt disappoint in his sexy outfit, couldnt do boxing because he crashed his microlight it turns out?!?. We were at this point joined by Drill Instructor Number 2, his name is Mark, its all M's! At the end of each circuit (we had to do three, on the sand, 2 long gruelling hours) we had to throw a die and take the challenge, what do we get, jump in the pool first (save that for the end) and then cha cha cha (very amusing watching the instructors, they didnt like that one) and then a crab race, which of course I won. Then its jump in the pool time, Raymondo took his top off, Michelle had to stop me grabbing his moobs and beer belly, the rest of us did our Wet T Shirt look. So whats next, finally some real food (michelle and I were so starving we nicked half the bread rolls) and then a cross country bike ride. I'm in my padded shorts, no flies on me, Raymondo and Cabbage Patch Sian (sorry but just realised today thats what she looks like) are in their Jeans!!!!! Only brought one set of clothes they say. Gross, I'm like you are not seriously going to do this exercise in your jeans. Raymondo comes back with drawstring shorts on, OMG me and my big mouth, even more gross now. He is soooo competitive (well he had to be decent at something) and right up Mark's arse (small but perfectly formed as Michelle said). How muddy, we are like slipping all over the place, my white trainers are black, my face and arse covered in mud but really really exhilarating if a little scary and very hard work. I like the grove, so laid back, we go into the studio covered in mud, honest, to do our fitball class and stretching, cabbage patch sian, still in her jeans, honestly. Michelle says their stretching looked like foreplay, I am laughing hysterically but couldnt bring myself to look. Michelle fell of her fitball, I am laughing so hard at her I fall off mine too, that will teach me!

Next a relaxing treatment, that was everyone else's not mine, mine is a pretty rough scrubbing and massage but its good none the less. Little cat nap required at that point, on my own as you will remember cos of mess up on treatment times, michelle wakes me up with champers, oh ok then I say. We polish that off quicker than you can say jack robinson and try and gatecrash a couple of weddings on the way to dinner. Seriously we had to walk through both to get to the restaurant, we could have gone for it but how could we miss another fantastic night with the misfits!

We are exhausted, literally eat and stagger back off to bed and deep slumber, today we discover that Raymondo and Cabbage Patch Sian stayed for hours so they could keep tucking into the free buffet. Turns out they only won the blooming trip, at a pharmaceutical conference, wonder if Raymondo wore his shorts to that. This morning she comes to breakfast in lilac hotpants. Yikes. She says all this spa kind of stuff is not top of her priority list, frankly looking at her cellulite it should be (hell we've all got it but dont need to show the stuff off , I could see that holey cheese from last night I swear it), maybe her priority is staying white, she is milk bottle, only one thing worse than brown cellulite in lilac hotpants, you got it its white cellulite. Sorry if I sound like a cow, just saying what everyone thinks and really nothing terribly personal, sure she is a lovely lady really. Sorry but after the courgette thing I cant warm to Ray so I'm not going to say he's nice, tight wad, complaining he had to sign for our dinners last night (thats cos he ate enough for the lot of us!) as if he was going to have to pay for them. Some people! Plus I saw as he was checking out today that he had nicked the extra bikini butt bag we were given, saddo.

Well my story is nearly over, we believe it or not went for more punishment in the gym, we were feeling good. All I can say is running isnt my strong point and balance isnt Michelles, we had a real giggle and poor Mike showed us some more exercises, sure he was glad to see the back of us all, little does he know we will be back for more. Totally totally worth every penny we loved it and they are going to do a ski bootcamp apparently, sign us up!

Night Night, hope you enjoyed the read...

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